Who do you think of First?

When you get extra money, you start thinking about what you will do with it. Who does that money eventually benefit? You or others?
When you discover extra time on your hands, what do you do with it? Who gets the benefit?
Who do you hang out with? Why?

These are questions I'm in the midst of asking myself. Because I realized that my time and money has gone to only myself this summer. I told God and myself that I would be sold out for Him. Did I follow through with that? Ashamedly, no. I failed. I called Mom and Dad yesterday morning, and I was on the verge of crying. I disappointed God! I let myself think of me first. At first I felt guilty about it and told myself, dear you need to wake up earlier and have your quiet time! But I just found excuses why not to, and kept waking up at the last possible minute. I have done that all my life. Why can't I change??!! The spirit it willing but the flesh is weak.
But I desire to change. The Bible says Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Seek ye first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be added to you as well. So encouragement to myself: CHANGE IS COMING.

God has also been telling me something this summer: Feed my lambs. And those lambs are Cash and Jackson, too bored boys looking for things to do right beforeschool starts. Even though they are annyoing and they have come to my house to hang out with me when I'm napping and busy, they need the guidance that I can give them. God was telling me this and I wasn't listening. Well, I'm listening now God!